“Everyone is a genius at least once a year. Real geniuses simply eat crunchy peanut butter.”

   —Some famous philosopher, probably

Ever since people had a choice between crunchy and smooth peanut butter, a great debate has risen. Which is better? Men and women vehemently argue for and against each side.

“If I wanted peanuts on a sandwich, I’d put on some Planters Dry Roasted, not a nut spread.”

“Smooth peanut butter is so plain. It’s like rubbing a sticky facial cream on a sandwich.”

In reality, there is no debate. Crunchy peanut butter destroys smooth peanut butter not only in regards to texture, but also taste, health, and personality (yes, food has personality! Especially, peanut butter).

Crunchy has texture.

Mmm…All of that texture

It offers a crunch every sandwich needs.

Crunches like lettuce

It reminds me that I’m eating real nuts…


And not a sugary, engineered nut butter.

It’s rugged in appearance—unafraid to show up to the party in a stained t-shirt and a six-pack of PBR….

…whereas smooth peanut butter might judge you for owning a white t-shirt.

So much judge. Look behind the smile.

Smooth peanut butter tries too hard in appearance

But beauty runs skin deep.


What’s on the inside counts.

Gushing. Simply gushing.

Crunchy bursts with personality.

“Ya Mother thinks you’re gorgeous.”

For example, it’s loaded with 30% more fiber than smooth…

…and you know it.

…and it even contains more healthy fats!

Smooth peanut feels like eating tasty globs of glue clinging to the roof of the mouth.

Crunchy transforms bread from snack to meal.

It’s filling. Vivacious. And nutritious.

Are you a chunky or smooth kind of person?

If you’re interested in food beyond the PB&J, we have a list of real food adventures in NYC that’ll tingle your taste buds more than peanuts and salt—crunchy and smooth.